Mike's Top 10 Songs We Liked, But Don't Want To Admit It

10   Wipe-out (The Fat Boys & Beach Boys)

True story.  We were sitting around the office trying to think of this list, and someone mentioned the Fat Boys doing "Wipeout"  We all shouted "YES!"  Dug up the song and played it.  Not having heard the song in over 15 years, we all still remembered over %70 of the lyrics, all the dance moves including the hand over mouth spitting like your rapping moves.  It was comedy in the office.

9   She's Like The Wind (Patrick Swayze)

Sad to admit that I liked this song.  This was my "Im a rocker, but this is my sensitive side that I show so I could get the chicks" in the seventh grade song.   The song was sad excuse for music, and the fact that I thought I could get chicks was even sadder.

8   Convoy (C.W. McCall)

I can still remember this song and its link to my childhood.  Back in 78 when this song was a big hit, Kevin and I were sure that we were going to be truck drivers.  Kevin sitting down under a tree and explaining to me that "Bear" was trucker lingo for cops made me even more sure that a truckers life was for me.  We used to sit by the road and try to talk to the semi's as they drove by in our toy walkie talkies.  "Breaker one nine, Breaker one nine, you hear me? over."  was said at least a billion times.  And when they would go by and you would do the "Yank on your horn" movement with your arm, and the truck driver actually did it, heaven.  Then, when we saw Mr McCall sing his song on national TV, probably the show Hee-Haw, and he did not use a microphone, but a portable cb to sing into, it was too over the top and unbelievably cool for words. 

7   After The Rain (The Nelson Twins)

Back in 1990 the sons of Ricky Nelson put together an album and released it.  It had a couple hit songs, and one of them was "After the Rain"  Now, the Nelson boys were both tall, skinny tan and had long bleached white hair.  And the song After the Rain was about how even when life is rough, there will be better times to follow.  That pretty much seemed like a good theme for that time at my life.  I liked that song until one day my room mate, who was a hard core rocker, came in and saw me watching the video and said "Dude, their pretty hot!", and then left the room not realizing that they were two guys, not two girls.  I shut off the TV and vowed that I would never admit that I liked that song. 

6   Jump (Criss Cross)

Those two warped children that wore their pants backwards came up with this popular song in the early ninties.  Everyone thought it was cool, until the kids tried to do a followup song that flopped.  The first try was cute, the second song made the public realize that these kids actually believed they had musical talent and were shunned from the public. They are probably pimps or live in a crackhouse now, still wearing there pants backwards telling everybody to JUMP!

5  Hangin Tough (New Kids On The Block)

This was supposed to be the "Were hardcore and not just a boyband"song from the New Kids On The Block.  I challenge anyone to this day that new the song back then to not do the "Ohhhh Whoaaaa Whoaaaaa Whoa Whoooaa!" part of the song when they hear it today.  It cannot be ignored.  This was when Donny and the boys were on top of the world, and there were New Kids On The Block backpacks, lunch boxes, pencils, ballons, marbles and everything else you can think to slap a name on.  2 weeks later, the group was no longer cool and it was all over.

4   Blame It On The Rain (Milli Vanilli)

Milli Vanilli were on top of the world the summer of 90.  They were the best new band, women wanted them, guys wanted to be them.  Kevin bought there tape and played it loud on his stero in his truck.  When someone said that they sounded like plastic, Kevin jumped in and defended the Vanilli's with all his heart and try to explain how they were as important to music as Elvis.  Two weeks later when you found out that they had not sung any of their songs, and it was two fat guys, they were forced to give up their Grammy, and Kevin just pretended that they never existed and the whole thing never happend. 

3   Can't Touch This (M.C. Hammer)

This song was so bad, but to this day is still considered cool.  On a good day you can still get Justin to do his "MC Hammer" dance.  It is one of the many oxymorons in the music industry.  You had Hammer with that bad "Edge" haircut, baggy pants and wiggled around on stage like he was dancing.  He milked that song for all it was worth, and when the bottom dropped out he dropped the M.C. and was just "Hammer" hardcore gangster rapper.  I remember he had a video where he was in a speedo by the pool doing the gangster rapper dance, it was pure comedy.

2   Hold On (Wilson-Phillips)

No man can ever say the he listend to, much less like this song.  This song was a women empowerment song about being tough, and things will get better.  This was sung by a pretty hot blonde chick,who by the way was also in the hit movie "Caddyshack 2", yeah right.  The skinniest dark haired chick ever, and a rather um, rotund yeah thats it, rotund, red haired girl.  The three of them were sitting on the beach pleading for women to hold on for one more day.  

1   Ice Ice Baby (Vanilla Ice)

This song is pretty much at the top of everyones "I cant belive I liked that song" list. Vanilla (Mr Van Winkle) Ice tried his best to put himself off as a hardcore rapper, complete with the carvings in his hair, and his eyebrows.  He told everyone that he was from the bad side of the tracks, and he rapped about his life.  Turned out he came from a upper middle class suburb of Miami, and was even part of the cheerleading team.  Again I think of Kevin and how proud he was to have a white rapper to listen to, only to throw the tape out of his moving truck two weeks later when Vanilla was no longer cool.